Part I, Book 8, Chapter 5
A Suitable Grave
Javert puts Jean Valjean in jail, and the whole town of Montreuil-sur-mer is abuzz with the news that their mayor was actually a convict this entire time. I have to say, I’d absolutely be gossiping too—that’s pretty juicy stuff. Sadly, pretty much everyone forgets Madeleine’s good deeds (seriously?? even the reverse burglaries??) in all of this.
Not his loyal doorkeeper, though. She is completely stunned, and in her shock goes about her routine without thinking; out of habit she sets out the candle and key for when the mayor returns to his room that evening, and only hours later does she realize what a dumb thing that was to do.
So it’s very shocking, and very funny, when Jean Valjean shows up and takes the candle and key like it’s a normal evening. But wait, we and the doorkeeper all think, we thought he was in jail?
He was. Jean Valjean explains: he just broke a bar off the window and hopped out.
Incredible. Once again, JEAN VALJEAN IS A CAT. Have you ever trapped a cat in a room and made it impossible to escape, only to find the cat wandering happily around the house later, because I have. This is peak cat behavior.
Also, incredibly dumb of Javert to have just witnessed Jean Valjean snapping an iron bar earlier that day and then think that he could be contained in a room where the window has got…iron bars.
I mean, dude, you fully identified “freaky superhero-level strength” as one of Jean Valjean’s key attributes! Javert: not the brightest bulb in the box, I’m afraid!
Valjean asks the doorkeeper to go get Sister Simplice, and goes up to his room, where among other things, he wraps up the silver candlesticks. I know there’s a lot going on, but I am so relieved that he’s taking the candlesticks with him.
Simplice comes in, and Valjean gives her a note to give the curate, which she’s welcome to read, and does. The note indicates that Valjean is leaving all his money and property and wishes for the costs of the trial (I have questions about what financial obligations you incur for a trial when you bust in, make a dramatic announcement, and immediately leave, but that’s neither here nor there) and Fantine’s burial to be deducted, with the rest to be given to the poor. The bishop would definitely approve.
They’re interrupted by a commotion on the stairs; they hear Javert’s voice, and the doorkeeper very loudly states that no sir, no one has entered the house all day! Bless her for warning Valjean this way—it buys him and Simplice just enough time to act quickly.
What does this super-strong, parkour-capable cat-man do? Does he nimbly do a flip out the window? Does he snap another iron bar and beat Javert to death with it, which I realize is unnecessarily violent, but would result in net good for the world?
No, Valjean hides in the corner behind the door. On the one hand, this is kind of pathetic, given what he’s capable of. On the other hand, that is absolutely what a cat would do, so I guess it checks out.
Simplice, meanwhile, drops to her knees at the table and starts to pray.
When Javert busts into the room, all he sees is a nun praying, and he stops, because his veneration for authority puts religious servants above reproach. He’s so respectful that in any other circumstance he would just leave, but he is so determined to find Jean Valjean (who, again, is a super-strong dude he put in an easily escapable room—maybe you should be fired for real this time, Javert) that he has to get to the bottom of this.
So, knowing full well that Sister Simplice cannot lie, Javert asks her point blank: is she alone in the room?
While the tension is sky-high in this moment, I do have to say that it is incredibly funny that this is all happening with Jean Valjean just hiding on the other side of the door. Javert has no idea that Jean Valjean, the elusive prisoner he’s hunting, is just four Oreos away.
So Javert has asked a nun who cannot lie, who is most definitely not alone in the room, if she’s alone in the room. And, incredibly, she says yes.
Javert quickly has a follow-up question: has Simplice seen Jean Valjean, escaped convict? Simplice lies again and says no.
Two lies! In quick succession! From a woman who has never lied in her life, ever! Simplice, you are such a real one.
(I gave it some quick thought and Simplice, one could argue that you didn’t actually lie! You could have been emotionally/spiritually alone in the room, and it’s completely accurate to say that you haven’t seen Jean Valjean—a man you’ve never met and wouldn’t be able to recognize—when you have seen Mayor Madeleine. You didn’t actually lie, your truth streak continues unbroken, QED.)
An hour later, a man (who we all understand is Jean Valjean) is seen quickly walking out of town in the direction of Paris. Man, real rough that he has to make the 131-mile journey by foot now that he can’t just throw money at horse-drawn vehicles.
We conclude with a few paragraphs which function essentially as an epilogue to Fantine’s story, and it’s…not great. Because the parish priest carrying out Valjean’s hasty instructions decides that it’s best to give as much of the money to the poor as possible, he skimps on Fantine’s burial and sticks her in the pauper’s grave with all the other poor anonymous people.
On the one hand, Valjean, maybe you should have stuck a few extra words in there to stipulate that Fantine get a proper burial. On the other hand, the bishop would…well, I don’t know if he would straight up approve, but he probably wouldn’t disapprove.
In any case, Fantine’s bones are now mingled with countless others, lost and forgotten. “God knows where to find the soul,” Hugo says, which is small comfort. This poor, poor girl.
Thus ends this book and, in fact, Part I. Fantine’s story has now concluded in full, and we move onto Part II, “Cosette.”
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